Meet Joan Price!

Crunch, by Liz Neporent with John Egan, from the famous New York gym, is a quirky fitness book that beginning and intermediate exercisers will want to read all the way through just for fun. It's hip, weird, and entertaining enough to make you laugh as you learn. For example, sensible, basic information is followed by points like "Remember... the faster you run, swim, cycle, or skate, the less chance of steaming bird dung hitting your head," and lists such as "7 things to pretend if you get bored running," including such motivators as "Pretend you're running on the face of someone you hate" and "Pretend you're running from millions of screaming fans."

A list of "exercise lite alternatives" gives the minutes it takes to burn 50 calories in a number of activities, such as "brisk walk to the store, massage parlor, or away from crime scene" (12 minutes); "vacuuming, scrubbing floors, or bonding with your erotic partner" (10 minutes); and "Gardening, clipping bushes, or burying evidence" (9 minutes). Aerobic and strength-training exercises are demonstrated by outlandish models, such as a black male in a long blond wig, bike shorts, garter belt, stockings, and aerobic shoes. Another male model wears a ballet tutu as he demonstrates step aerobics. A model for strength-training exercises has only one arm.

The Crunch program is a good one, with solid information and several routines: one using weights and a step bench, another a circuit-training program with bands and a step bench, a "no-frills" program using household objects, an abdominal routine, and several stretches. The clever format and sprightly style make fitness training palatable even to the reluctant exerciser. (Doubleday, 1997, $14.95 U.S., $19.95 CAN.)