A Love Letter to Aging Bodies and Faces
Do you think aging has made you less attractive? Do you have difficulty seeing yourself or your partner as sexy and desirable?
Then it’s time to challenge your own as well as society’s perception that only young bodies and unlined faces are sexy and beautiful. We need to accept – no, celebrate! – our wrinkles and rejoice in all the pleasure these bodies can still give us.
Let’s join together and practice rejecting society’s youth-oriented view of beauty, keeping ourselves fit so that we feel happy with our bodies, and keeping a loud, buoyant sense of humor!
I love my 71-year-old husband Robert’s face and body. I look into his vibrant blue eyes and I see the young man as well as the older man. The older man is no less sexy than the younger man must have been (I didn’t know him then). In fact, he’s more sexy, because he has learned how to live joyfully and love completely in ways that a young man can’t know until he has lived a full life.
I look in the mirror, where new wrinkles seem to appear weekly. I try to walk my own talk, accepting my own face as I accept Robert’s, telling myself these wrinkles are badges of living, laughing, and loving. I tell myself, this is the youngest I’ll ever be from now on!
I asked my 103-year-old great aunt what it felt like to be more than a hundred. She said, “I’m the same person I always was.”
So are we. Rather than trying to deny our aging — which is futile anyway — let’s celebrate it.
(Photos by Mitch Rice, Robert’s son, on Robert’s 71st birthday)
I don't want to sound like a pig or anything but personally, when it comes to senior women, I've always found them more attractive completely naked. It just seems certain types of women look good some ways and not others such as athletic women do not wear dresses very well nor supermodels who do look good in bikinis.
Perhaps it's my own perception, but them fully-clothed looks like they are trying to hide or conform. I figure at that age they would be comfortable with their own bodies: wrinkles, silver hair, crow's feet and all.
8/20Anon A.K.A August 20 Anonymous
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I forget how I landed on this site, but speaking as a man who has been into older women (and vice versa) ever since college, I have always found "flaws" much more interesting than plastic-molded perfection. I LOVE lines! I like texture. Just as bold curves catch my eyes a lot quicker than bland flatness.
And think: laugh lines means somebody who laughs a lot. Crow's feet mean a frequent smiler. Why would you not want someone with those qualities? Everyone is entitled to his or her own preferences, but this idea that youth has a corner on beauty is over.
Anonymous, have you asked your husband that question?
I don’t know him, but I do know that the secret to staying sexy timelessly is to FEEL sexy within yourself, whether there are “rugged lines” or not.
If the love is deep and not superficial, your husband will feel this way about you, too.
I am married to a younger man than I am. I would like to ask if when I get old and rugged lines do you thank he will find me sexy.Iam 9 years older then him. thanks for your help
Dear Ms. Price:
Since launching our Ageism in America blog last fall, the International Longevity Center has been watching the various players in the “elderblogging” community with great interest.
We are quite taken with the refreshing viewpoints consistently expressed in “Better Than I Ever Expected.” For instance, we could not have put this rallying call better ourselves:
“Let’s join together and practice rejecting society’s youth-oriented view of beauty, keeping ourselves fit so that we feel happy with our bodies, and keeping a loud, buoyant sense of humor!”
We are happy to have noted your blog in our latest post: Elderbloggers: A Cyberforce to Be Reckoned With.
And, since our President & CEO is the author of the book, The New Love & Sex After 60, we thought you might be interested in hearing about his forthcoming book entitled “The Longevity Revolution.” You can learn more about it by visiting http://www.thelongevityrevolution.com.
Many thanks for your engaging work on behalf of the aging community,
Anti-Ageism Task Force
International Longevity Center-USA
New York, NY 10028
http://www.ilcusa.org
I want to comment — again — because as much as I talked recently about the ever so validating attentions of younger men, in all I think men get sexier as they get older. Given that you’re blessed with pretty good health and have worked with that blessing to stay in reasonably good shape, age puts a patina on one’s youthful looks that is very becoming and attractive.
Here are some of my favorite sexy male movie stars: Morgan Freeman, Tommy Lee Jones, Sam Shepherd, Billy Bob Thornton. There are more, can’t think of them right now, but they’re all older men. I think Tommy Lee Jones is divinely sexy these days with all those rugged lines in his face, and I would rather have sex with him than Antonio Banderas. (Maybe when Antonio gets a little older!) I don’t think I would ever want to have sex with Brad Pitt, gorgeous as he is.
For obvious reasons I don’t fantasize about Robert 🙂 but he’s a splendidly lovely man. I bet there are lots of wonderful men like Robert in the world. And when it comes to sex there’s nothing like experience. Older guys rock.
. . . and so does everyone else at every age!