Older Women Wear Lingerie Revisited

  I wrote “Older Women Wear Lingerie” in 2009 about my photo shoot at age 65 with photographer Ruth Lefkowitz. It was a liberating experience, both during the shoot — I had no idea how much fun it would be to disrobe and flaunt my underwear in front of a camera! — and afterwards, when I viewed the photos.

Two years later, I knew I looked older. Grief ages us, and I could see it in my face. I had stopped coloring my hair. My skin was looser, more wrinkly. My thighs and fanny were bigger.

But I felt beautiful, because I’ve really internalized the message I keep communicating to you:

We don’t have to buy into our youth-obsessed society’s view that only young, firm, fertile bodies are sexy and alluring. We are beautiful, handsome, sexy at our age.

That statement is true for you, too, no matter how many wrinkles or extra pounds you see in the mirror. It doesn’t matter.

If you accept yourself, enjoy yourself, and feel sexy within, it will show. 

Ready to walk my talk (or pose my talk, more accurately),  I approached Ruth about doing a repeat of our photo shoot, with new lingerie, a new attitude, and two more years under my belt — I mean camisole.

She said yes. We did it two weeks ago.

Again, I loved the experience. We laughed, we romped, I posed, she clicked the camera.

 I am delighted to share our photos with you today, on my 68th birthday.

If you live in Sonoma County, CA, and would like to talk to Ruth about doing your own lingerie photo shoot, please email me and I’ll forward your email to her.

As always, I welcome your comments! How would you feel about posing in lingerie?

Ruth Lefkowitz is fascinated by how the camera captures spirit, beauty and style in a magical instant. She especially enjoys photographing the female figure–a subject of art through the ages–to create images that capture and preserve a bit of a woman’s inner life. In her day job, Ruth is the chef and owner of Ruthy’s Real Meals, a high quality, organic and locally sourced meal delivery service in Sonoma County, CA.

Older women wear lingerie

11/10/2011 update: I did a second lingerie shoot, as I was about to turn 68. See it here.

10/23/2011 update: My goodness, two years after I originally wrote this post on 10/11/09, it continues to be the most often read! Hmmm. Ruth and I are actually planning an update — a new photo shoot this week, results to be posted as soon as they’re ready. My reasons are maybe the opposite of what you might think: No, I’m not fixing to show off a youthful body. Rather, I’ve aged a lot in the past two years, have stopped coloring my hair, and want to celebrate my authentic self by re-doing this photo shoot. Yes, I’m nervous. Of course I am. But if I keep insisting that we should stand up for what’s real at this age and celebrate our aging process, then I have to walk (or pose) my talk . 


“I’m photographing real women in lingerie,” Ruth Lefkowitz of Ruthy’s Real Meals told me. “Would you be willing to model?”
Wow. A “real woman” I am, all 65 years of me, and I do love lingerie, but I’ve only worn it for intimate hours, not a photography session.

I’m not shy, I just don’t think my 65-year-old body looks as good as it used to. But whose does? And if you can’t do something new and outrageous as an older person, when can you do it? “Sure, Ruth!” I said. “And if I love the experience, I’ll blog about it.”
I loved the experience.
The wonderful people at HerRoom were happy to provide some lovely garments and were enthusiastic about a woman my age modeling them.
We met in a garage converted (roughly) into a photography studio. Ruth made me feel comfortable with her relaxed, matter-of-fact approach to posing me and complimenting me. We had many giggles, too.
Ruth was exuberant about what she called my “curves,” and when I expressed alarm that the sags, folds, and puckers would come to light, she reassured me that she was there to capture the beauty in real women.
By golly, I think she did it.
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Photos by Ruth Lefkowitz. If you live in or near Santa Rosa, CA, and would like to be photographed by Ruth, please email me and I’ll put you in touch.







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Lingerie provided by HerRoom Lingerie We Buy For Ourselves