Sex Toy Sightings Winners!
When I announced my Sex Toy Sightings contest, I didn’t know what to expect. I knew it would be funny and surprising, and I was right about that.
This project has been a delight, thanks to all the contestants and their creative photographs. Sex toys were spotted in workout rooms and yoga classes, on library shelves, at a cemetery, and in stores of all types. There were plenty of outdoor scenes, including Rockefeller Center in New York City at Christmas. Many people noted that although their toys were public and very visible, passers-by generally ignored them.
Here are our winners
Most Prolific Sex Toy Photographer, first place: Louise, age 69, submitted 27 photos. She took her glass dildo to the ocean, her flogger to the library, her strap-on dildo to the pool, her handcuffs to the gym, and various sex toys to stores selling food, clothing, even children’s toys. It is my honor to pronounce her the winner in three categories (see below) as well as Most Prolific. Her prizes: We Vibe Melt and Fun Factory Stronic Drei.
Most Prolific Sex Toy Photographer, second place: Dave, age 81, submitted 12 photos, including three category winners (see below). His prizes: We Vibe Melt and Hot Octopuss Pulse Duo.
Photo Taken While Surrounded by the Most People: Adult film star and sex educator jessica drake took her LeWand Chrome Grand Bullet to New York City for Christmas. She wrote me, “At Rockefeller Center I used it to put the star atop the iconic tree with tens of thousands of people standing shoulder to shoulder all around me. Some of the comments were, ‘You GO, girl,’ ‘Is THAT…?” and “That’s amazing, what’s it called?” Although jessica told me she had all the sex toys she needed, she was happy to receive copies of my Ultimate Guide to Sex after 50 and Ageless Erotica as her prizes.
Most Beautiful Photo(s): Louise captured the prize with these two lovely shots of her glass dildo at the ocean.
Best Story of What Happened When the Photo Was Taken: Dave posed his We-Vibe Unite and his We-Vibe Wish cuddled together atop a police car at the police station. As Dave tells it, “Got some strange looks and comments from one officer who came out in the rain to ask why I was putting a ‘bug’ on one of their vehicles. I had forgotten about the security cameras in the parking lot. I guess being 81 years old helped get me out of that one. Are the police ever young!”
Best Conversation with a Stranger When the Photo was Taken: Sharon, 60, took her Magic Wand on a 4 a.m. 
romp in her workout center, submitting 9 photos. While she was taking this one of her Magic Wand climbing the climbing wall, “Four beautiful young men were working out.” One of these men told her, as she clicked the photo, “Excuse me, you’re standing on my mat!” Her prize: We-Vibe Touch from The Smitten Kitten.
Best Story About No One Noticing the Sex Toy: Raven, 64, took her Fun Factory Volta to the yoga studio. She posed it on the altar, among the carrots at lunch, and on her mat in a variety of yoga poses. “No one even asked me what I was doing, although I took my time placing the toy in several fun poses and then casually putting it away in my yoga bag,” she says. “I was surprised and amused that not one person made a comment to me, although many were around. I have trouble believing no one noticed. In the yoga studio maybe they are all just too deep in meditation.” Her prize (by her request): a new Fun Factory Volta.
Riskiest Photo: Ness created her “Tadpoles” photos with her collection of Tracey Cox Supersex Kegel Balls by climbing over rocks and hanging onto a tree branch to get the “tadpoles” positioned right and position herself for the best angle to take the photo. Glad you survived it, Ness! Her prize: Three of my webinars.
Best Footprint in the Sand: I invented this category when I saw Jeanne’s lovely photo of her Tenga Iroha Yuki at Mission Beach, San Diego. Her prize: $100 gift certificate from Good Vibrations.
Best Statue Carrying Sex Toys: I invented this category, too, because Dave’s photo of The Lovers, each carrying a We-Vibe sex toy, needed an award.
Most Fitting Juxtaposition of Sex Toy and Surroundings: We have three winners here:
Dave’s half-century-old sex toys were just right under the sign, “Dead People’s Stuff: Antiques.” Dave tells me, “Both these toys are over 50 years old and still fun and pleasurable. Advertised as a ‘personal massager’ back in the ’60s, the Prelude was way ahead of anything else on the market and still gets plenty of fun time use. I have rewired it a number of times.” (Hey, Dave, I used to have a Prelude, too!)
Linda’s Kegel balls look like a miniature version of the dumbbells in the gym at the Hilton Garden in Phoenix. “There was a gentleman running on the treadmill behind me,” she says. “He was either too engrossed in TV to notice, or maybe did not realize what I was taking a picture of.” Her prize: $100 gift certificate from Good Vibrations.
Louise’s flogger-wearing dildo knew its place at her public library: in the crime fiction section, in this photo titled “Crime and Punishment.”
Photo That Made the Judges Laugh the Hardest: Louise’s Sunbathing Strapless Strap-On Dildo was the funniest photo submitted. If we had a category for Best Sex Toy That Looks Like Something Else, she’d win that, too!
We also had several runners up who won’t go empty-handed: They’ll get $25 gift certificates from Lucky Bloke. And our friends at Wicked Sensual are sending all the winners and runners up a bottle of Toy Love lubricating gel, plus a variety of water-based lube samples to keep their sex toys well lubricated for pleasure.
Shamus MacDuff wasn’t eligible for a prize because he helped me set up and judge the contest, and he took preliminary photos to show what we were looking for. But he kept on taking photos — 43 total! — including this one of the Womanizer 2Go and the Hot Octopuss Pulse at a rural cemetery with a fitting message.
Congratulations to all our winners and runners-up, and many thanks to the wonderful companies that donated prizes! Please click on their links and purchase from the stores that support senior sex health and pleasure.
Sex Toy Sightings update
12/29/19 update: I know I said “Winners announced by December 27,” but I need another few days to match winners with prizes and compile the best stories. Stay tuned!
12/19/19 update: I’m getting so many entries today – the original deadline – that I’m extending the deadline until 12/21! Keep ’em coming!
The entries are rolling in for my #SexToySightings contest, and I can’t resist sharing a few of the photos before the contest closes so that you feel inspired to send in yours! Sex toys have been visited beaches, police stations, libraries, antique stores, gyms, cemeteries, grocery stores, downtowns, even Rockefeller Center. People have submitted from one to a dozen photos each — no limit to how many you can enter.
Even jessica drake got into the #SexToySightings action during her trip to New York City:
Many of the photographers had great stories — we give prizes for great stories, too! — but I’ll save those until we announce the winners.
I hope you feel inspired to take your own sex toy out in public for a photo session. Contest rules and submission procedure here — please follow these exactly.
We have lots of great prizes donated by Hot Octopuss, We-Vibe, Good Vibrations, Smitten Kitten, Fun Factory, Wicked Sensual, Lucky Bloke, and me. I look forward to hearing from you by 12/21/19!
Love Dances In: Dec. 10, 2000
I wrote the blog post below on December 10, 2010. I’m revising and reposting it on Dec. 8, 2019, as I near the 19-year anniversary of my first meeting with Robert. I find myself sad and contemplative — but also grateful that I had the honor of loving Robert and being loved by him. So much has changed in my life in the past 19 years that never would have happened if Robert hadn’t been looking for a new place to dance and found my line dance class. Ageless fitness works for everyone!
December 10, 2000 turned out to change my life in every way: my emotions, my personal growth, my sexuality, my view of aging, even my career. That was the evening that Robert’s life journey landed him in my line dance class. He had recently moved to Santa Rosa and was looking for a place to dance.
Here’s how I tell it in Better Than I Ever Expected: Straight Talk about Sex After Sixty (the book that never would have been written without that eventful evening):
Love Dances In
The day that Robert Rice walked into my line dance class, my hormones thought they were twenty years old again. His smile, fit body, and grace of movement caught my eye immediately.
Then, when he started to dance, his years of tap, modern dance, and ballet training were revealed in every movement, and I was lost at sea. His nimble feet, muscled thighs, and sensually mobile hips commanded my attention. I wanted to touch the inviting curl of chest hair that peeked through the open top buttons of his shirt. I met his dazzling blue eyes and pretended to breathe. For the rest of the evening, I kept losing my place in the dance I was teaching because I couldn’t take my eyes off him.
Robert kept coming to class and danced into my heart. I tried to engage him in conversation after class occasionally, and he responded almost warily, answering me but not giving me any signals that my attentions were welcomed or reciprocated. I wondered: Is he gay? Attached? Or simply not interested in me?
I started inviting him for walks after class, which he accepted. We talked, but never very personally. I told him about the Internet health book I was writing, and he told me about his art and the English gardens of his travels. There was no touching, no eyes locking, no double entendres, no intimate details revealed.
We choreographed a line dance together, which felt extraordinarily intimate to me. We were using our bodies to communicate and showing each other movements, which was very sexy. But the harder I tried to push to the next stage, the faster he retreated.
December 8, 2019 update:
I Melt with the We-Vibe Melt
Oh, oh, oh, the We-Vibe Melt! This “Pleasure Air™ stimulator” surrounds the clitoris with vibrating pulses of air that feel to me like gentle, rhythmic sucking — the best kind of gentle, rhythmic sucking: the fast-to-orgasm kind of gentle, rhythmic sucking.
But when I say “gentle,” I don’t mean mild or wimpy. The 12 — count ’em, 12! — intensity levels are powerful enough for those of us with aging bodies that require extra sensation.
I’ve enjoyed other Womanizer “air pulse” vibrators immensely (read my reviews here), and those came with two removable heads for optimal fit and easy cleaning. The We-Vibe Melt is all one piece. Can one size fit all?
I don’t know the answer to that — but yes, it worked for me, and I’ve read only positive reviews from others. Positioning it took a bit of effort the first time, and when it slid off-course, the vibrating lube noise made me laugh. Once I got it situated correctly and knew how much pressure to apply to keep it from sliding, it was pure pleasure.
The Melt’s shape is ergonomic. It’s smooth and easy to hold without crooking an arthritic wrist. It’s slim enough to use between two bodies during partnered sex, and delightful to use solo.
The controls are clear and easy to feel and see without any need for reading glasses. Turn it on and increase intensity with the “+” button; turn it down and off with the “-” button. Charge it easily via a magnetized USB connector.
Although I didn’t test this, preferring to control my own vibrator, the Melt also has the “We-Connect” app that lets a partner control the intensity and patterns from a Bluetooth-paired smart phone.
At age 76 now, I’ve been around the block. This pleasure tool takes me around the world. How lucky that we’re getting old during a time of high-tech vibrators like the We-Vibe Melt! Get one for yourself!
June 2025 update: The coral color has been discontinued. Links have been changed to the blue Melt, which is still available. Please see my review of the updated Melt 2 available in purple and sage.
10% off with coupon code JOAN10
