“Encouraging advice, and a great love story, too”

Toni Goldfarb, medical writer and co-author of the American Lung Association’s 7 Steps to a Smoke-Free Life, wrote such a stirring customer review of my book on Amazon.com that I asked her permission to reprint it here. Thank you, Toni!

Encouraging advice, and a great love story, too

If you’re trying to decide which of the new “sex over 60” books to buy, definitely choose this one. It is not a step-by-step “how to” book that might offend people, although it does cover every aspect of sexual activity–married, single, solo, gay, straight, young, old, one-night, long-term (50 years and even longer). Instead, the book provides practical, encouraging advice from experts and from ordinary women about the joys of loving relationships, dealing with sexual problems of menopause, loss of interest in sex (or your partner’s loss of interest and/or ability), how to approach sex with a new partner, helpful exercises, and even a detailed discussion of sex toys and assistive devices. (I thought these were only for “adventurous” couples, but the book explains how they can make sex possible and more enjoyable for older people).

Plus, this book is also a beautiful love story which could stand on its own, even without all the excellent sex information. The writer chronicles her many relationships, from her first teenage romance (You’ll be furious to learn how her father broke up what might have been a lasting relationship), to a succession of sexual affairs, including a short failed marriage. It’s easy to see why she had given up on finding true love. But she never gave up on having an active, fulfilling life as a dance and exercise instructor, despite two devastating auto accidents that left her with many scars and lasting injuries.

And then, magic! In the form of a trim, gray-haired, older man she spots in one of her dance classes. These are true-to-life 60-plus people, not wrinkle-free, gorgeous-body super models, but the story of how their love and sexual relationship blossomed is a real page turner. And be prepared for a few tears when you come to a troubling revelation near the end of the story.

This is a thought-provoking, informative, encouraging book you’ll definitely want to share with friends.

Pacific Sun: Tips for Older Lovers

I was interviewed about love in later life by Jill Kramer for the Pacific Sun (Marin County, CA), Feb. 10, 2006, under the title “Tips for Older Lovers“:

I think later-life love is the best. We come to each other with decades of adult life experience, including many relationships that may have helped us grow to the next stage when that person doesn’t fit any more — so then we’re ready for someone who can match us at that next level of growth. So I think it’s natural for us to grow into and grow out of relationships until we get to the point where we really know who we are and what we’re looking for and what we have to give.

It’s harder when you’re older to find the right person. And it’s hard to hold out for someone who’s got everything you’re looking for. So sometimes people get into relationships that are only partially fulfilling because they figure, “Well, I’m not going to do any better.” Yeah, you are! Don’t settle! Do the things you love to do and look around at who else is doing them. Be yourself, don’t put on any kind of an act. Be the person you hope to find.

Library Journal: “wealth of insightful information”

Martha Cornog reviewed Better Than I Ever Expected: Straight Talk About Sex After Sixty, along with other new books about sexuality and older women, in “The Go-Go Golden Libido” in Library Journal, February 1, 2006:

Our third senior sexpert, health writer Price focuses on a smaller number of women of the 1960s “love generation” who are still having happy and wonderful sex. Drawing on data from emailed questionnaires and telephone interviews, the author shares personal stories and a wealth of insightful information about having good sex; dating; staying sexy; coping with hormonal, physical, and medical problems (including vaginal atrophy); and keeping erotic warmth alive in a long-term arriage. Many of these women have been adventurous and continue to be—their stories are not for the monogamy-at-all-costs crowd. Yet this is the book’s strength: reassuring senior-aged women who feel abandoned by the numerous “coupled through life” books (and perhaps distanced from “vanilla” friends) that they are not freakish or alone. One quibble: it could’ve been more inclusive about safe(r) sex, though there’s an excellent reading list and even footnotes.

Seasoned Women Spicy in New York Times

The Weekend Arts section of the New York Times, 1/13/06, featured a cover story titled “Post-Salad-Days Women Agree: They Want ‘What She’s Having'” by Dinitia Smith about books and movies that “echo the message that seasoned women can be sexually spicy.”

Better Than I Ever Expected was quoted twice:

Also arriving this month, from Seal Press, will be “Better Than I Expected: Straight Talk About Sex After Sixty,” by Joan Price, who spices the book up with her own experiences. (“I rub moisturizing lotion gently into Robert’s skin,” she writes. “I love seeing him standing naked before me.”)
By and large, the books carry an optimistic message — that despite age, menopause and wrinkles, women can continue to enjoy sex. “We are having hot, fabulous sex after sixty,” Ms. Price writes. “Society’s vew of aging women as sexless is wrong, wrong, wrong.” Her book includes advice on fitness and remedies for those who can’t achieve orgasm.

The article discusses Gail Sheehy’s Sex and the Seasoned Woman at length, references movies like “Something’s Gotta Give” and “Under the Sand,” and quotes Jane Juska (author of A Round-Heeled Woman and the upcoming Unaccompanied Women: Late-Life Adventures in Love, Sex and Real Estate), historian Linda Gordon, and NYU professor of psychiatry Leonore Tiefer. I’m happy to be in such company in this well-written, provocative article.