ViboKit: Build your own rabbit
[10/18/12 update: I learned that this product has been discontinued
(sorry!), but I thought you’d get a kick out of this review anyway,
so I didn’t remove it. Enjoy!]
I love the idea of a “rabbit” vibrator that operates vaginally and clitorally at the same time. But if you’re like me, getting a vibrator designed for dual-action is hit or miss. If it hits the g-spot right, it misses the clitoris altogether. If it hits the clitoris just right, the vaginal action is all wrong. We’re all built differently. Wouldn’t it nice if you could build your own “rabbit” to your own dimensions?
With the ViboKit Upgrade Kit from Babeland, you can! This genius idea consists of a bullet (small, compact vibrator) in a rubbery home attached to a stretchable ring that fits around your dildo of choice. So you take the innie that works best for you, attach this outie, and voila — you have a rabbit vibrator that fits you. So cool!That’s the idea of the Upgrade Kit, and it mostly works.
This isn’t in the instruction sheet — oh wait, there is no instruction sheet, just a diagram on the side of the box — but before use, you have to remove the bullet from its snug home (just twist and pull a bit), open it, and remove the little paper over the watch batteries that is keeping it from vibrating in the UPS truck during shipping. The first time, I got a faulty bullet which wouldn’t turn on, whatever I did, and then when I left it alone for a while, it turned itself on and wouldn’t turn off. It just skittered around the room on its own. I had to unscrew it it to make it stop.
The sign of a great sex toy retailer is its customer service. The moment I reported the problem to Babeland, a new one was on its way to me. The new one works perfectly — it turns on when I press the button, stays on if I hold it down for a few seconds, and turns off the moment I press it again. So that first one was indeed defective and a fluke. I include this not to embarrass Babeland or ViboKit, but to assure you that the retailers I recommend stand behind their products 100%.
The kit has more than the bullet attachment, though that’s the whole reason I wanted it. It also has a nubby ring to put around your dildo for more sensation, and a suction cup (!) so you can attach the whole business to the bathtub or to a wall (I suppose) for hands-free operation for a photo op or to delight a partner. (“Honey, open the door verrrry slowly!”)
I didn’t trust the suction cup — I didn’t want it to come loose and break either the mood or my toys. So I tested it attaching my newly created rabbit to the shower wall with my hands ready underneath. It stayed on the wall. I turned on the bullet — it stayed on the wall. I turned on the dildo also — it stayed on the wall! I truly expected that it would shake loose and fall, and I would scoff at the whole idea — but it actually stuck. Hmmm! I have no wish to make love to the shower wall, so now all I need is some reason that I’d want to stick it to the wall.
“Forget the shower wall!” I hear you shout. “How did your homemade rabbit work?” It worked fine for what it was — a bullet attached to a favorite vibrator. It was easily adjustable and stayed where I wanted it. But the bullet itself just isn’t strong enough for me. It might be for you, though.
Thank you, Babeland, for helping me build my own rabbit. And at only $28 for the whole kit (as long as you already have a favorite dildo), how can you go wrong?
“You honor me when you do your work” — Robert to Joan
As much as I enjoy and believe in my work, it’s often hard to concentrate on writing my book with Robert gone. After more than a year and half, I still can’t breathe in and out without missing him mightily. He is always in my thoughts and in my heart.
Almost right up to the end of his life, Robert actively supported my dream of this book. “You’ve got to keep doing your work,” he told me earnestly, knowing he would not live to read it. During the last weeks that we were able to walk in the park together, we discussed this book—what would be in it, how it would expand on topics brought up in Better Than I Ever Expected
I would read him excerpts from emails and interviews that were coming in, and he would listen compassionately. Sometimes he would sit down in my study and start talking, and I would scramble to type what he said.
Although my beloved Robert died before this book could be written, it will be as much his as mine. “You honor me when you do your work,” I hear his voice telling me.
Men: ED? See MD — it can save your life
Erectile dysfunction can be a cardiovascular health alarm going off, finds a German study reported in Circulation: Journal of the American Heart Association. ED should take you to the doctor’s office and a cardiovascular workup, never ignored. It can be the first sign of atherosclerosis, which can show up in the penis several years before the onset of cardiovascular disease, because arteries in the penis are smaller.
According to an article by Thomas H. Maugh II in the LA Times,
Dr. Michael Bohm, a cardiologist at Germany’s Saarland University, and his colleagues studied 1,519 men from 13 countries who were involved in a study of two drugs to treat cardiovascular disease. The men were also queried about their ED at the beginning of the study, two years into it and at the end at five years. A full 55% of the men had ED at the beginning of the trial, nearly double the normal incidence of about 30% in the population at large.
The team reported that, in the five years of follow-up, men with ED were 1.9 times as likely to die from heart disease, twice as likely to have a heart attack, 1.2 times as likely to be hospitalized for heart failure and 1.1 times more likely to have a stroke. The risks increased with the severity of the ED.
This study is one more of many that point to the need not only to consult a doctor about ED but also to make sure a cardiovascular workup follows.
In writing Naked at Our Age, I hear from many men with ED who are justifiably concerned and exploring medical diagnoses and solutions. But I also hear–often from women whose spouses have developed ED–about men who will not go to a doctor, will not discuss it with their wives, and often withdraw from sex and intimacy altogether. Others may ask their doctor for Viagra or Cialis without ever investigating the cause of the ED.
About.com sex educator Corey Silverberg brings up another part of the problem — doctors aren’t trained to talk about sex,and it’s hard to get a useful conversation going about it. True, Corey, but our lives may depend how hard we try.
Don’t ignore ED and don’t just treat the symptoms with drugs– find out what’s going on. Please.
I invite your comments.
Satisfying Senior Sex for Women, Too!
Older women stop having and enjoying sex sooner in their lives than men do, a study in the British Medical Journal found. That’s because the medical community has no idea how to help women maintain their sexual health and pleasure after menopause without the use of potentially dangerous hormones. Women don’t have any “little blue pill” to make things work better when their bodies have given up.
But the truth is, there are simple answers:
1. Live a “Good Sex Lifestyle” which includes daily exercise, a healthy diet full of fruits, veggies, nuts, whole grains and healthy fats and free of white sugars and flours, low-to-moderate alcohol intake, and daily doses of chocolate, Omega-3 oils and lots of Vitamin D. Healthy women enjoy good sex much longer than those in poor health.
2. At menopause and later, care for your vagina. Moisturize her daily or more with a good moisturizing lubricant (no glycerin), and massage her inner walls two to four times per week for five to ten minutes, with either a well-made vibrator or a partner’s fingers or penis. For more details, see our Vaginal Renewal™ program.
3. Have at least one orgasm per week, with yourself or a partner, it doesn’t matter. Keep those nerves functioning properly and remind them what pleasure feels like. If it’s hard to have orgasms, use a vibrator. Men use tools all the time, why shouldn’t you?
4. Get enough sleep, keep your stress under control, and keep a positive outlook. Your body will thank you for it, and your mind will be able to think sexy thoughts without distraction.
5. Think sexy thoughts, often. Fantasize, reminisce, create erotic stories in your head (or on paper), talk about sex, plan for sex, and make it a priority. Nurture your sex life, and it will love you back for many years to come.
– Ellen Barnard, MSSW is a sex educator and co-owner of A Woman’s Touch Sexuality Resource Center, which offers education and products to support healthy sexuality for everyone, with a focus on older adults and those living with cancer. She can be found at http://www.sexualityresources.com/.
I think Ellen’s information is vital, and I hope you’ll pass this link to your friends, colleagues, lovers, wives, and mothers. If more mid-life and older-age women knew these self-help strategies for enhancing their sexuality, there would be more satisfied smiles on their faces! — Joan Price