Men: ED? See MD — it can save your life
Erectile dysfunction can be a cardiovascular health alarm going off, finds a German study reported in Circulation: Journal of the American Heart Association. ED should take you to the doctor’s office and a cardiovascular workup, never ignored. It can be the first sign of atherosclerosis, which can show up in the penis several years before the onset of cardiovascular disease, because arteries in the penis are smaller.
According to an article by Thomas H. Maugh II in the LA Times,
Dr. Michael Bohm, a cardiologist at Germany’s Saarland University, and his colleagues studied 1,519 men from 13 countries who were involved in a study of two drugs to treat cardiovascular disease. The men were also queried about their ED at the beginning of the study, two years into it and at the end at five years. A full 55% of the men had ED at the beginning of the trial, nearly double the normal incidence of about 30% in the population at large.
The team reported that, in the five years of follow-up, men with ED were 1.9 times as likely to die from heart disease, twice as likely to have a heart attack, 1.2 times as likely to be hospitalized for heart failure and 1.1 times more likely to have a stroke. The risks increased with the severity of the ED.
This study is one more of many that point to the need not only to consult a doctor about ED but also to make sure a cardiovascular workup follows.
In writing Naked at Our Age, I hear from many men with ED who are justifiably concerned and exploring medical diagnoses and solutions. But I also hear–often from women whose spouses have developed ED–about men who will not go to a doctor, will not discuss it with their wives, and often withdraw from sex and intimacy altogether. Others may ask their doctor for Viagra or Cialis without ever investigating the cause of the ED.
About.com sex educator Corey Silverberg brings up another part of the problem — doctors aren’t trained to talk about sex,and it’s hard to get a useful conversation going about it. True, Corey, but our lives may depend how hard we try.
Don’t ignore ED and don’t just treat the symptoms with drugs– find out what’s going on. Please.
I invite your comments.
Satisfying Senior Sex for Women, Too!
Older women stop having and enjoying sex sooner in their lives than men do, a study in the British Medical Journal found. That’s because the medical community has no idea how to help women maintain their sexual health and pleasure after menopause without the use of potentially dangerous hormones. Women don’t have any “little blue pill” to make things work better when their bodies have given up.
But the truth is, there are simple answers:
1. Live a “Good Sex Lifestyle” which includes daily exercise, a healthy diet full of fruits, veggies, nuts, whole grains and healthy fats and free of white sugars and flours, low-to-moderate alcohol intake, and daily doses of chocolate, Omega-3 oils and lots of Vitamin D. Healthy women enjoy good sex much longer than those in poor health.
2. At menopause and later, care for your vagina. Moisturize her daily or more with a good moisturizing lubricant (no glycerin), and massage her inner walls two to four times per week for five to ten minutes, with either a well-made vibrator or a partner’s fingers or penis. For more details, see our Vaginal Renewal™ program.
3. Have at least one orgasm per week, with yourself or a partner, it doesn’t matter. Keep those nerves functioning properly and remind them what pleasure feels like. If it’s hard to have orgasms, use a vibrator. Men use tools all the time, why shouldn’t you?
4. Get enough sleep, keep your stress under control, and keep a positive outlook. Your body will thank you for it, and your mind will be able to think sexy thoughts without distraction.
5. Think sexy thoughts, often. Fantasize, reminisce, create erotic stories in your head (or on paper), talk about sex, plan for sex, and make it a priority. Nurture your sex life, and it will love you back for many years to come.
– Ellen Barnard, MSSW is a sex educator and co-owner of A Woman’s Touch Sexuality Resource Center, which offers education and products to support healthy sexuality for everyone, with a focus on older adults and those living with cancer. She can be found at http://www.sexualityresources.com/.
I think Ellen’s information is vital, and I hope you’ll pass this link to your friends, colleagues, lovers, wives, and mothers. If more mid-life and older-age women knew these self-help strategies for enhancing their sexuality, there would be more satisfied smiles on their faces! — Joan Price
“Endless foreplay and multiple orgasms”- she’s 58, he’s 68, ED no barrier
While Better Than I Ever Expected: Straight Talk About Sex After Sixty
celebrated the joys of senior sexuality, my new book, Naked at Our Age (coming Spring 2011 from Seal Press) concentrates on the other part — the physical setbacks and emotional challenges of sex and intimate relationships in later life. I have more than a hundred personal stories and a bevy of amazing experts answering questions and addressing concerns.
My fiance (age sixty-eight) and I are in an incredible, sensual, passionate relationship. We met about a year ago. Sparks flew immediately, and we jumped full force into each other emotionally. I must say, I was quite surprised, as I didn’t know I could be that passionate again, and neither did he.
He was widowed, and I was divorced after a long-term marriage where I was rather bored with sex with my ex. My new lover aroused me in ways I never felt before. Neither one of us had had many sexual experiences and were not “world wise,” but what came naturally – whew! What a ride.
My lover has had prostate cancer, and so we didn’t expect much sexually. He is not able to sustain an erection. But–what the man can do with his hands! Wow. He is able to give me “inside” orgasms as well as out. All I can say is endless foreplay and multiple orgasms. I just roll with it and we play for at least an hour.
I pleasure him daily also. At first it was a little weird to kiss and caress him while he was not erect. But I got over it, and he gets so much pleasure out of it and I enjoy doing it for him.
We both are enjoying being truly desired and wanted. I am slightly overweight and always felt uncomfortable about my body with my ex-husband. But, my new lover tells me often how much he loves every inch of me. What a gift to my self-esteem he has been!
We both enjoy cuddling and this is a great source of comfort and intimacy for us. We are both in shock over the pleasure this sexual relationship gives us. Of course, we are in love and I truly believe that we could only reach this level of connection and intimacy in a spiritual committed relationship. We are getting married in June.
We sleep in the nude, which I love also. We believe this greatly enhances our activity as we are always open and available to each other’s touch and arousal usually follows. We plan to cuddle and snuggle–we call it “huggle”–for many years to come!
Finding Love in Later Life
When Carol Denker interviewed me for her magnificent Autumn Romance, she started with this prelimary questionnaire. I came across it today and wanted to share it with you, as Valentine’s Day approaches:
CD: What advice would you give to individuals over 50 who are looking for love?
JP: Participate in social activities that you love, and you’ll meet people with similar passions. In my case, I loved line dancing — in fact, I taught line dancing. That was how I met Robert Rice, the love of my life, a man who happened to be looking for a new place to dance in December 2000.
CD: What have you learned about love from this relationship?
JP: I had no idea how deeply I could love and how precious later-life love could be. We seemed very different at first, and both of us were fiercely independent and – we thought! – unwilling to change at this stage of life to suit another person’s needs or expectations.