Posts Tagged ‘sex toys’
Over 50? Your sex toy store experiences
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| Joan at Smitten Kitten Minneapolis |
6/30/17 update: So many folks in our age group have never shopped in a sex toy shop, or think they’re all dark, scary, and sticky-floored. I describe today’s progressive sex toy store, demystify the experience of shopping there, and encourage you to find the closest store and visit in “How to Shop for Sex Toys” for Senior Planet. I quoted several of you! I hope you’ll comment there and copy your comment here, too. Thanks for being part of our community.
How old were you when you first visited a sex toy store? If your first visit was after age 50, what was that like for you? How did the staff make you feel comfortable (or not)? Was it difficult for you to ask questions? I invite you to share by posting a comment.
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| Good Vibrations San Francisco |
Many of my events are in sex toy stores. At 73, I’m comfortable in stores whose walls are populated by shelves of vibrators and dildos. I love to visit to see what’s new. I pal around with staff members, delighting in the kinds of discussions that sex nerds enjoy.
Yet I frequently hear from people of my generation that they don’t feel comfortable even going into a sex toy shop, let alone asking intimate questions of strangers who look to be the age of their grandchildren. I know what terrific resources these stores are, staffed by trained sex educators and filled with sex toys (aka “orgasm tools,” as I sometimes call them) that can intensify your sexual pleasure in ways you thought had disappeared or at least decreased after a certain number of birthdays.
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| Pleasure Chest NYC |
I’d love for this post to become a discussion. Whether you love sex toy shops or you’ve never dared go in one, or anything in between, please share your experiences and views as comments on this post.* You don’t have to use your real name (choose something other than “anonymous,” please, just so we can keep track of who’s saying what), but please give your real age.
I might want to quote from your experience in an upcoming article. I won’t identify you, except by age, unless you want me to. Thank you!
* Please, though, don’t post a comment aimed at promoting your own business. If you want to advertise on this blog (a very good idea if you want to reach our age group, but only after I scrutinize your site, the quality of your products, and your customer service), email me to inquire. Any commercial promotions disguised as comments will be swiftly deleted.
The Wish from We-Vibe
There’s a lot to love about the Wish by We-Vibe. Relatively small, the Wish is powered by two motors that work independently to give a variety of 10 patterns. For its size, it packs a powerful punch. It is made of body-safe silicone, is light and small enough for travel, and can be used solo or during partner sex for extra clitoral stimulation. It’s quiet, even at the highest settings. And it’s fully waterproof!
As an external vulva vibrator, the Wish is designed to curve over the whole surface of the vulva, sending vibrations to the nerve endings of the external and internal clitoris. (If you’re not familiar with the parts of the clitoris that reside under the skin, my ring illustrates this in miniature, and click here for an explanation.)
You can also use the tapered tip for pinpoint vibration, if you like. The tip is pointy, soft, and squishy, so you can press down for a delightful and intense sensation.
My only problem with the Wish is that it’s not quite strong enough for me. Almost, but not quite. It packs a lot of power in its small size — it’s not at all a wimpy vibrator! But at 73, I often need the turbo power of the Magic Wand, the Doxy Die Cast, or the Sybian. I acknowledge — and you’ve told me this, readers — that most of you don’t need the same level of intensity that I do. In that case, I think you’d love the Wish. And if it’s not quite strong enough, it’s a lovely warm-up to whatever you choose as your main event.
The Wish is rechargeable using a magnetic charger. The silver plates that you see at one end are for charging. The controls are the less visible, raised white button. I found the button difficult and slightly painful to press with my arthritic hand. Pressing with my thumbnail solved the problem, and I recommend that technique. Or, use the app:
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| Power Pulse setting |
We-Vibe offers We-Connect™, a free app that you can download from your app store, that lets you control your Wish via your phone or tablet. You can turn it off and on, choose a pattern, and turn the intensity up or down.
At first I was indifferent to this idea — why not just press the button? But I tried it, putting my iPad on the bed beside me, and I found I liked it!
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| Massage setting |
I could swipe up to get to full power. I could swipe right or left to choose a pattern — which was nicely illustrated on the screen — instead of pressing the button until I happened upon one that I liked. I understand that I can also create my own pattern using the app, but I didn’t try that.
I think We-Connect™ would be particularly helpful if you have a disability or condition that makes pressing the button difficult. There’s also the option to let a lover control your Wish via the app from anywhere in the world. I didn’t try that — let me know if you do, and how you like it.
Although We-Vibe promotes the Wish as a vulva stimulator, and it definitely works for that, I think that any set of genitals would enjoy the sensations. It also works nicely as a whole body massager, curved to fit the body’s peaks and valleys.
Thank you, Good Vibrations, for sending me the Wish by We-Vibe in return for an honest review.
2016 Holiday Gift Guide for Sexy Seniors
Whether you’re looking for a special gift for a loved one, for the two (or more) of you, or for your own private pleasure, here are some recommendations to put a sexy, satisfied smile on your or your giftee’s face.
If you think your gift won’t arrive in time, blame it on me for getting this Gift Guide out so late. Write a note about your intentions and welcome in the New Year when it arrives. (Or email me and I’ll hand write the note for you, scan it, and email it back to you.)
Two of our favorites have new updates:
The Pulse III * for penis pleasure has arrived from Hot Octopuss, and it’s better than ever. Now you can go from any level straight to “Turbo Mode.” An anti-stall sensor prevents any pressure from interfering with the vibrations. The Duo partner’s experience has been improved. And now it charges magnetically. Every penis owner that I know who has tried any version of the Pulse has loved it, especially because no erection is required. I appreciate that as good as it is, Hot Octopuss keeps improving this penis pleaser. Read this review of the Pulse I and II and this one of the Pulse Solo and Duo II from our contest winners. Order the new one here.
* 2021 update. This version of the Pulse is no longer available. Links have been changed to the Pulse Essential, the newer comparable model.
Do you own a Sybian? If you do, check out these two new silicone attachments to ride into orgasm: Triple Delight has soft clitoral and anal stimulating bumps at either end of a penetrative G-spotter. (Yes, you can have it all.) The Silky Smooth Flat Top is for you if you prefer your vibrations without penetration — use it in either direction and put the bump wherever you want it. If you’re unfamiliar with the glorious Sybian, read my review here (notice the discount code!) and learn about other silicone attachments here.
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| Rumble |
Here are some special sex toys that I reviewed in 2016, with quotes from these reviews and links to the full reviews:
Rumble. “Do you want a vibrator that’s well-designed, well-made, body-safe, and fairly strong — with a truly ergonomic shape, size, and weight? A solution if you have wrist arthritis or any condition that makes it difficult to grip or hold up a wand vibrator for as long as it takes to get the job done.”
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| Doxie Die Cast |
Doxie Die Cast. “Strong as in lie-back-and-it’ll-happen strong, even if your orgasms usually take a lot of effort. If you like a high intensity clitoral vibrator, this power tool will sing to you in great, rumbly, throbby tones.”
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| Prism V |
L’Amourose Prism V. “A curvaceous work of art that happens to be a deep, strong, and rumbly g-spot vibrator. The shape and faceted design are lovely, and it’s easy to hold.”
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| Womanizer |
Womanizer W500. “It’s the suction. It doesn’t just vibrate (though it does do that) — it gently pulls on the clitoris, bringing blood flow, engorgement, and increased sensation. It’s not ‘sucking’ like a vacuum — it’s subtle, but oh so effective and pleasurable.”
Here are couple of new products that might strike your fancy. I haven’t written full reviews of these, but they deserve mention here:
Funkit. (Yes, that’s an “n,” not a “c,” though the logo with the “n” on its side makes you look twice.) This beautiful silicone dildo aims to please, whether you use it vaginally or anally. The end is a suction cup, so you have even more options for play. Check out Funkit’s website for many more dildo designs that show you that sex and art can be a lovely couple. They also make butt plugs, spanking paddles, and textured rings for your pleasure-giving finger.
O-Wand. Big and heavy — 1.6 pounds and 13 inches long — this elegant, powerful, silicone vibrator is curved with an ergonomic handle so you can hold it in different ways and even rest it on your body. It comes in a huge (17″), fancy box, includes a nubby cap accessory and a set of charger adapters for different countries. There’s no pouch, though, which is strange considering its high price. It’s completely waterproof, so you can take it in the tub with you. (I recommend not taking it in the shower, because if you drop 1.6 pounds on your foot, it could be serious.) Get 15% off with the discount code “BETTER15” — just for our readers.
Überlube: When you want to feel a gliding sensation of skin on skin, this luxurious silicone lubricant delivers. Long-lasting for our slow-burning older bodies, slick for our delicate tissues, and a clear favorite of mine. Available in an elegant glass bottle or a refillable travel case.
Wicked: Want to smell and taste like a candy apple, cinnamon bun, or salted caramel? Wicked has a delightful collection of flavored lubricants, most of then water-based. Buy them at SheVibe,
Lucky Bloke: For the best selection of condoms, Lucky Bloke has you covered — so to speak. Take their simple test to make sure you’re wearing the right size condom, then order some sampler kits and try different brands. Lucky Bloke also offers lubricant samplers.
Of course it would make me very happy if you got your giftee or yourself one of my senior sex books — the gifts that keep on giving. A good choice for a holiday gift is Ageless Erotica, a ground-breaking anthology by talented writers over 50 featuring steamy, sexy characters over 50 (sometimes decades over 50). Ageless Erotica presents sexy seniors enjoying and sharing their erotic moments in short stories and memoir essays . And while you’re looking at my books, how about giving your sweetie or yourself one of my self-help senior sex books for the new year?
This kitten is Bobby Joe, a new member of my household. He is trying very hard to take on the role of resident sex kitten.
Doxy Die Cast: So Strong!
There’s a new sheriff in town, and her name is Doxy Die Cast. She’s strong, brightly colored, strong, made of a snazzy aluminum/titanium alloy, strong. Did I mention that the Doxy Die Cast is strong? Strong as in lie-back-and-it’ll-happen strong, even if your orgasms usually take a lot of effort. If you like a high intensity clitoral vibrator, this power tool will sing to you in great, rumbly, throbby tones.Let’s back up. I had the privilege of talking to Ruby Goodnight from Doxy at the Woodhull Sexual Freedom Summit last month. At the Doxy booth, I was dazzled by the gorgeous colors of the Die Cast models. After turning one on, I was even more dazzled by the strength of the vibrations.
In 2014, I had written a glowing review of the original Doxy Wand, so Ruby was familiar with my love of Doxy. When I told her I had to review this new model, she said she worried about its heavy heft for me, because she knew I wanted sex toys to work with arthritic wrists. That’s one of my criteria for reviewing sex toys.
However, having experienced the Doxy Die Cast, I must repeat what I said about the original Doxy:
I generally prefer vibrators that are easy on arthritic wrists — this one is not. It’s heavy, it’s huge, and I would be in pain from trying to hold it for any length of time. However, that’s irrelevant, because it works so fast that my wrist barely notices. Yes, it’s that good.
What do I love about the Doxy Die Cast? Let me count the ways:
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- It’s really strong. (Yeah, I know I’ve made that point already, but that is the point.)
- The head is made of body-safe silicone and has a bit of cush for comfort.
- The head is large enough to send vibrations over much of the vulva and the internal clitoris, those pleasure-giving nerve endings under the surface. (See my Clitoring for an illustration of the wishbone-
shaped part of the clitoris that we don’t see.)
- The control buttons are large, easy and comfortable to press, and they light up.
- The vibrant color wouldn’t be enough to sell me on a vibrator, but when I’m already sold, gorgeousness is an added bonus.
The Doxy Die Cast is easy to use — just press the power button quickly to turn it on, then increase or decrease intensity with the “+” or “-” buttons. But there’s also a mode called the “pulse setting” that you might not find on your own if you don’t read the manual. This is a revving up from low intensity to high. Once you’re in this mode, the “+” or “-” buttons vary the rate of acceleration. I usually don’t care about vibrational patterns, but this is especially pleasing! Access the “pulse setting” it by turning off the Doxy, then press the power button for two seconds and it will be running in pulse mode.
Here are some things you might not like so much, though they don’t bother me when compared to the pleasure:
- It’s big and heavy — 13″ long by 2.38″ wide, weighing 1.8 pounds.
- It has to stay plugged in while in use. (That’s understandable for powering a motor that strong.)
- Be careful following the instruction booklet, which is not completely correct for this model. Since the Doxy Die Cast has a silicone head (not “medical grade PVC” as it says — that’s a different Doxy), you do not want to use silicone lubricant with it, despite the booklet’s instructions — use water-based lube instead. Doxy tells me that these errors will be corrected on the next print run.
It comes with its own cushioned storage case. It’s a huge, hardshell case, 19″ long, so don’t expect to carry it in a backpack. I would have appreciated a storage pouch in case I wanted to store or pack it without the mondo case, but this case will keep it clean and protected.
The Doxy Die Cast is available from SheVibe, a splendid sex toy shop with a devoted blogger following, because they treat their bloggers and their customers so well. Their website is also fun, because of the sexy comic art throughout the site. Check it out.
(Would you please tell SheVibe that they need some artwork showing people our age? Do you see me with my hand in the air, volunteering to pose?)
