Posts Tagged ‘vibrator review’
Talking sex toys on Dan Savage’s podcast
Dec. 12, 2015: I am moving this post from July 2015 to the top, because I have many new readers and some of you might need holiday tips for sure-to-please sex toy gifts for a lover or for yourself. Enjoy!
And if you don’t have my latest book yet, The Ultimate Guide to Sex after 50 is a gift that will give you information and resources after the holidays are just a memory. — Joan
I had the pleasure of recording a guest segment on Dan Savage’s Savage Love podcast, answering two caller questions. It’s live here: Episode 456. I’m on the Micro (free) version for 10 minutes and on the Magnum (paid subscription) for more than 20 minutes.
At the end of our Magnum segment, Dan asked me for some quick vibrator recommendations for the over-50 crowd. Here are the ones I mentioned, with links to my reviews so that you can learn more about them:
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| Magic Wand |
Magic Wand (rechargeable): It has everything we loved about the Original Magic Wand plus new attributes that make it the ideal sex tool for those of us who need really strong vibrations.
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| Sybian |
Sybian: Can I call a 22-pound, vibrating, mountable, power tool a “vibrator”? That’s like calling the Sydney Opera House a music device. Straddle the Sybian, turn the dial to control the sensations, and enjoy.
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| The Pulse |
The Pulse: A pulsing, oscillating, amazing vibrator for penises that does not require an erection for his pleasure!
Here are some more favorites that I would have added if we had more time:
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| Eroscillator |
Eroscillator: Especially fabulous for clitoral stimulation during partner sex because it doesn’t get in the way of two bodies.
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| Private Gym |
Private Gym: A penis workout for stronger erections — including weights. This is no gimmick!
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| Womanizer |
Womanizer: A sex toy that sucks your clitoris — and that’s a rock-your-world sensation!
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| Palm Power |
If you’re new to my blog, it isn’t just sex toys all the time, but yes, I do review sex toys a lot, and always from a “senior perspective.”
What’s a “senior perspective” and why do we need it?
- Our need for long, slow arousal requires a vibrator that doesn’t overheat, run out of battery charge, or burst into flames if we need to use it for a long time.
- We want sex toys that don’t strain arthritic wrists.
- They must be made of body safe materials, especially with our thinning genital tissues.
- We want to be able to see the controls without having to put on our reading glasses.
- Above all, we need intensity: strong vibrations. We’re battling our (lack of) hormones. And we’re winning!
If you’re new to Dan Savage, he’s super smart and sex-savvy. Check out the free mini-version of his weekly Savage Lovecast. Even better, in my opinion, is the paid Magnum version that’s twice as long and ad-free. If you don’t yet subscribe to the Magnum version, it’s well worth the small amount of money to hear the longer version each week. Plus when you subscribe, you get to listen to ALL the past episodes — years of them! You can read Dan’s sex advice columns here. Dan is over 50 now — welcome to our world, Dan!
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| Joan and Dan, showing actual height difference |
MiMi Soft: Cushy Tip Vibrator
Many of us like strong vibrations, but we don’t like a hard toy pressing against our increasingly delicate genitals. A vibrator that presses against the clitoris with a bit of cushioning is just right, and the new MiMi Soft Rechargeable Waterproof Vibrator by Je Joue from Good Vibrations does exactly that.
The vibrator is firm and smooth, ABS plastic covered with a layer of silicone except that the tip is soft and cushy. Thank you, Je Joue. You have to press the tip hard against you to feel the “give” of it, but that’s often a natural action anyway as arousal rises. The soft tip makes the MiMi Soft an improvement over the original MiMi. I liked that one, but this one wins hands down… or hands on.
The MiMi Soft is smooth and tiny enough (3 1/2″ long x 2 1/4″ wide x 1 1/4″ thick) to fit in the palm of your hand. If you’re using it with a partner, it fits easily between two bodies without getting in the way. It’s completely waterproof for use in the tub or shower, which is a delight.
MiMi Soft has five vibration settings and it’s supposed to have six patterns. I don’t care about patterns — I prefer steady and strong — so I didn’t even notice that center button that controls the patterns didn’t work on mine. I’ve read other reviews and never read about that issue, so I’ll have to assume that this was just a problem with mine. (If I cared about it, of course Good Vibrations would replace it.)
I complained about the strength it took to press the buttons of the original MiMi, and although this one isn’t as difficult, it still needs pressure. When your fingers are lubed up, it’s impossible to feel the difference between the “+” and the “-” buttons, so you might have to grab your reading glasses and memorize which side is which so you don’t accidentally turn it down when you’re trying to turn it up.
Charging is easy with the magnetic charger. Plug it in, charge it for two hours or less, and you’re good to go with no cords in your way.
Is it strong enough? You know me — I like really strong vibrations. This one is not as strong as my favorite vibrators, but it does pack a punch for its size and the vibrations feel really good, less buzzy than most. For those of us who travel, the size is right!
Thank you, Good Vibrations, for sending me the MiMi Soft Rechargeable Waterproof Vibrator in return for an honest review. Right now it comes with a free silky blindfold.
Sybian Sex!
I have a new lover, pet, and housemate. Its name is Sybian. How do I describe Sybian? Can I call a 22-pound, vibrating, mountable, power tool a “vibrator”? That’s like calling the Sydney Opera House (which I plan to visit in September!) a music device. Do you want to know my Sybian review?
The Sybian is a big, curved apparatus designed to be mounted. You attach the attachment of choice, apply lubricant to the attachment and to yourself, straddle the Sybian, sit on it, turn the dial to control the sensations, and enjoy.
You can rock or you can just sit upright and let the Sybian do all the work. It’s not a bucking bronco — you won’t be tossed off.
Oh yes, it vibrates. Whoa, does it vibrate! It has a powerful motor, and, and depending on how high you turn the dial, the vibrations go from subtle to strong to 50 shades of holy moly!
Many of the photos and videos show a woman mounting the Sybian with her knees on the floor, but at our age, few of us would be comfortable that way. No problem — put it on a stable, elevated platform so that your feet can be on the floor. I recommend the optional storage cabinet that doubles as 3-level risers. That way, you can straddle it comfortably while sitting upright with your feet on the floor.
The cabinet is also useful because the Sybian is big and heavy — 22 pounds — so it’s not easy to carry or tuck away when not in use. The cabinet is built for it, hides it nicely, and has a separate storage area for attachments as well as a lock in case your visiting grandkids get nosy!
If straddling is uncomfortable for your hips, or if you can’t relax that way, you can lie down on your bed with the Sybian between your legs on its power-cord end. Then tilt it forward so that the attachment contacts your genitals without putting weight on you. It’s fine to use it this way — it won’t harm the Sybian or you.
The attachments give you a variety of choices: two for clitoral stimulation without penetration, a variety of options for clitoral pleasure with vaginal penetration, and one with a double dildo for vaginal and anal penetration. The Basic Sybian Package comes with two attachments; you buy additional ones separately or as a kit.
The insertable attachments don’t thrust. They vibrate and, using a separate control dial, they can rotate. It’s a different feeling if you’re used to thrusting.
You may find, as I did, that it took a half-dozen Sybian encounters to discover just the right combination of position, attachments, and intensities that work for you.
You may find, for example, that you get best results by starting with a non-penetrative attachment and switching to penetration when you’re fully aroused. You may find that spending 10 minutes on a low to medium speed vibration will get you ready for a higher speed, or that you like penetration with just a little rotation or a lot, or maybe that changes as you get closer to orgasm. Explore, and don’t get frustrated if it takes some experimentation before you experience earth-shaking orgasms. Important: Read the instructions first — don’t go straight to a discovery mission.
Pros:
- If you need strong stimulation, you can’t find a sexual pleasure tool that’s stronger than this.
- You can have all the sex you want: clitoral stimulation with or without penetration, with or without a partner.
- Attachments let you individualize it to your preference.
- Use it solo, or have a partner participate and enjoy your pleasure by watching or holding you or controlling the dial.
- If you like penetration, the insertable part can be slender (the finger attachment, pictured on the purple Sybian), jumbo, or some girthiness in between, depending on which attachment you choose.
- You can try it for 45 days, and if you don’t fall in love with it, you can return it for a full refund minus a $175 reconditioning fee. That’s an amazing deal.
Cons:
- It’s a learning curve — not just how to use it (follow the instructions, please — don’t just turn it on!), but how to adapt it for your individual needs and optimal pleasure. (This doesn’t have to be a “con” if you let go of expectations of instant orgasms and enjoy the journey.)
- Heavy, making it hard to move.
- It’s really loud. I was afraid that my close neighbors would think an airplane was taking off in my bedroom. If you don’t have privacy, this will be a problem.
- It costs $1,345.
I know I’ll get some criticism for recommending a $1,345 purchase. It’s not a sex toy — it’s a whole different category.
Here’s an idea if you have a few friends who are interested and the cost is stopping you: get together and get the 45-day trial, purchasing extra attachments for each of you. Since only the attachment comes in contact with your genitals, maybe you’d feel comfortable sharing the Sybian — a few days at your house, then put in in the car and take it to friend #1’s house, then to friend #2, and so on. I know some people who bought one in common and schedule who gets it on a weekly rotating basis.
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| Bunny Lampert shows Joan the Sybian |
The Sybian was invented by Dave Lampert in 1985, and it’s still a family business. The inventor’s daughter, Bunny Lampert, told me, “He was always curious about women and their orgasms — what was happening, and why it was so difficult. What could he create that would be designed for women’s sexual pleasure and nothing else?” Clearly, he figured it out!
Learn more about the Sybian here. If you have one, or have tried one, or have questions, I hope you’ll add your comments below.
Eroscillator: buzzing solo or with a partner
Eroscillator attachments
Toys Are Us: My Personal Vibrator History
I bought my first vibrator in my thirties at Macy’s: a “personal care” product for, uh, “massage.” The instructions said nothing about using it for sex, but, wink-wink, I knew.
For decades, I collected vibrators, trying to find the model that would do it for me. I don’t remember if I started with the Wahl (which I named Wally), with its many intriguing attachments, or the Hitachi M
agic Wand (named Big Buzzy), but after buying the first one, I quickly bought another.
Over the next few years, I filled three nightstand drawers with vibrators of all sorts, both plug-in and battery-operated. I had vibrators in the shape of a penis, egg, wand, rabbit, and probably more I’m forgetting. I must have tried every type of vibrator on the planet, not because I love variety but because it was difficult to find the one for me. I’ve always preferred the strength of plug-in rather than battery-operated sex toys, and now that I’m older, I need the most intensity possible. A “light touch” is pleasant, but if my goal is orgasm, it’s got to be strong.
A decade ago, I cleaned out my drawers, threw out the thirty-year-old attachments that had deteriorated into flakes of plastic, discarded the toys I didn’t really like, and kept only my favorites. I hated to throw this large collection in the trash, but I figured neither Goodwill nor my local consignment store would accept used sex toys, and they weren’t old enough to donate to Good Vibrations antique vibrator museum.
I decided I didn’t need all these extra toys anymore because I’ve discovered my favorite: the Eroscillator, an oscillating plug-in designed for clitoral stimulation. It feels great—intense and focused, with its smooth, rotating motion—and it is easy to hold, easy to aim, and easy to adjust intensity during the act. A twelve-foot-long cord makes it work in hotel rooms, where the outlet might be half a wall away. Best of all, the long, slim handle and small vibrating part make it simple and comfortable to use with a partner. It’s expensive—$120 to almost $200*, depending on attachments—but worth every penny.
Because the Eroscillator is endorsed by Dr. Ruth Westheimer and her picture is on the box, I named mine “Dr. Ruth.”
Electrifying Sex: Using Sex Toys with a Partner
At some point after Robert and I became sexual, I asked if he’d be open to using a vibrator with me. His response was a definitive, absolute, “No! I don’t want a machine in the middle of our lovemaking!” He had had no experience with what he called “appliances,” and they didn’t fit with his feelings about lovemaking as natural and spiritual. When I showed him my vibrator, it seemed like a noisy, mechanical thing.
Robert would make me come with his fingers before or after intercourse—I couldn’t come during intercourse at all. My sensations just weren’t strong enough anymore to bring me over the top unless I had really strong, direct, and focused clitoral stimulation. He kept asking if there was anything he could do during intercourse so that I could come that way, and my answer was always, “Only if we use a vibrator at the same time.”
Finally, he agreed to try it. The ease of giving me an orgasm and the intensity of my pleasure won him over. We’ve used it ever since, and it’s part of our love play. Now Robert will say in the middle of sex, “Let’s get my buddy, Dr. Ruth!”
– from Better Than I Ever Expected: Straight Talk about Sex after Sixty (2006)
Learn more about the Eroscillator
* 2024 update: These were 2006 prices. Now $200 and up (worth it!), depending on the attachments you buy. Make sure your selection includes the “soft finger”!
Note: I kept this excerpt in present tense although some crucial things have changed:
1. I lost Robert to cancer in 2008, but I still love remembering precious moments like these, and I couldn’t bear to shift the ending of this excerpt to past tense.
2. I now have several favorite vibrators. The Eroscillator is still in the top four for solo sex and top two for partner sex!