Womanizer Enhance: for clitoral delights!
It’s only March, and I already know that the Womanizer Enhance Pleasure Air + Vibration Clit Stimulator will be on my “Best Sex Toys of 2025” list. It’s a dance party for the clitoris, combining “Pleasure Air” technology with strong, rumbly vibration! It’s a threesome, even when you’re pleasuring yourself solo.
Pleasure Air (the air puff pulsations that feel like gentle sucking that we love in all Womanizer products) has been a huge orgasm donor to clitorises of any age, and — though I’m just guessing here — especially our age. Many of us need powerful sensation, yet often we don’t want the pounding or grinding of strong vibrators that can leave our increasingly more delicate vulvas feeling ravaged. The Pleasure Air technology gives us the sensation we need, without even touching the clitoris directly.
But what if we do love vibrations, but around the clitoris instead of directly on it? We get that with the Enhance, too.
Here’s how it works
- Apply water-based lube to the working end of the Enhance.
- Position the “nozzle” over the nub of your clitoris and gently press the flat rim so that it stays in contact with your vulva.
- Press the controls to get the sensations you want.
You’re choosing among 10 Pleasure Air intensities, 10 vibration intensities, and 10 vibration patterns!
Even if you’re a savvy sex-toy connoisseur, you need to read the directions. Separate controls adjust the intensity of the air puff sensations and the vibrations independently, with another button for patterns.
The control buttons can be tricky the first few times until you get used to the placement and feel of each button. Then you can put away the instruction booklet and your reading glasses. Since the instructions are tiny, let me help you decode the controls:
Notice these control markings:
Large “+” and “-“
Press and hold the “+” button to turn on the Enhance. Once it’s on, pressing these buttons quickly controls the intensity of the Pleasure Air sensations. Press and hold the “-” button to turn off the Enhance.
Side buttons
The smaller side buttons with wavy lines control the vibrations. Press the double wave to increase and the single wave to decrease vibration intensity.
Pattern button
The small button with little dots that is separated from the others controls the vibration patterns. Cycle through them by pressing quickly. Press and hold to return to steady vibration.
Pros
The Enhance is well designed for function and beauty. It’s made of body-safe silicone and uses a magnetic charger. It’s waterproof for easy cleaning and for fun in the shower.
Cons
Because of the complexity of the controls, I don’t think I’d recommend the Enhance for first-timers or folks used to simple vibrators. Let me know if you disagree.
Thank you, Betty’s Toy Box, for sending me the Womanizer Enhance in return for an honest review. Get 10% off the price of the Womanizer Enhance or any other product from Betty’s Toy Box with coupon code JOAN10
Sexy New Year’s Resolutions 2025
Do you want to make some changes in your sex life?
These Sexy New Year’s Resolutions will make a big difference, and they’re easy and fun to put into action. I first compiled these tips in 2018, now updating in 2025. Some come from my Senior Planet Ask Joan columns, others from my newsletter. What would you add or change? Please comment!
Redefine Sex. What brings us sexual pleasure and possibility is different at our age. That’s a feature, not a defect! Broaden your definition of sex to whatever activities arouse you and bring you sexual pleasure, partnered or solo. Embracing a new definition of sex expands your options for pleasure. Read this account of one reader’s experience.
Track the Tingle. For quicker, easier, and more satisfying arousal, figure out what time of day you feel most sexually responsive. When you feel the “tingle” – that quiver of erotic possibility – set aside time to indulge yourself sexually or schedule that time on your next free day.
Use Lubricant. A lubricant that keeps you moist and slick will increase comfort and intensify your pleasure. Use lube liberally both solo and with a partner, and reapply frequently. For health and pleasure, choose Wicked Sensual Care simply® timeless, created for our age group.
Just Do It. This is for you if you enjoy sex when you do it, but you rarely feel desire in advance. You’re experiencing “responsive desire”: your desire follows physiological arousal and pleasure instead of preceding it. So open yourself to engaging with your pleasure, and your desire will kick in.
Schedule Weekly Orgasms. If we waited until sex happened spontaneously, we might never have another orgasm. Schedule sex at least weekly, partnered or solo. The sexy anticipation –mental foreplay! — makes it even hotter when it happens.
Enjoy Sex Toys. Our hormonally challenged bodies may need extra help to reach orgasm. A well-chosen, well-placed vibrator can be the difference between orgasm and no orgasm. Start with “Vibrators for Seniors – especially for first-timers,” then read the many sex toy reviews in this blog to help you choose. Enjoy my “Sex Toys for Seniors” webinar.
Self-Pleasure Frequently. Solo sex is real sex, and it’s good for your general health, your sexual health and your sense of well-being. Give yourself solo orgasms, whether you’re in a relationship or not. You’re celebrating your body’s ability to give you exquisite pleasure.
Exercise Before Sex. Increasing your blood flow with physical activity isn’t only good for the heart and muscles — it’s also good for sexual function and pleasure. One of the best things we can do to speed up arousal and orgasm is regular exercise, especially before sex.
Sex Before Food. Eating before sex sends the blood flow to your digestive system instead of your genitals. Have sex first, then eat. Sexual arousal will be easier, orgasms will be more reliable, and you will relish that meal afterward.
Use Your Words. Learning to talk about sex is the key to getting what you want. A long-term partner is likely to continue doing what used to work, even if it doesn’t work for you now, unless you redirect the action. A new partner wants to know how to please you. Speak up.
Have Sex More Often. Difficulty with arousal and orgasm is a good reason to have more sex, not less. The penis and the clitoris require blood flow for engorgement. The more you engage in stimulation – partnered or solo — the more easily the blood flows to the genitals.
Use Safer Sex. If you’re sexual with new partners, use barrier protection. Many people with sexually transmitted infections (STIs) either don’t know or don’t tell. Use barrier protection (condoms for intercourse and fellatio, dental dams for cunnilingus). Please view my free webinar, Safer Sex for Seniors with Joan Price.
Enlist Help. If you’re having sexual problems in your relationship, see a sex therapist (find one in your location) or a sex-savvy counselor. Therapy will help you identify the underlying issues, teach you how to communicate more effectively, and give you new strategies.
Talk to Your Doctor. Difficulty with arousal, erections, orgasm, or pain requires medical attention. Practice this “medical mantra” for help bringing up the subject with your doctor. If your doctor is dismissive or unable to help, ask for a referral to someone who is more knowledgeable about your concern and more accepting of you as a sexual being.
Which of these are you already doing? Which ones will you put into action this year? Leave your thoughts and ideas in the comments below.
What Matters and What Doesn’t As We Age: Reflections on Turning 81
Aging is a precious gift. Those of us who age did not die young. A year ago as I approached my 80th birthday, I promised myself that I would write an article titled “What Matters and What Doesn’t As We Age: Reflections on Turning 80.” I wanted to reflect on what does and doesn’t matter about our changing appearance, bodies, sexuality, capabilities, relationships, hopes, fears, and how we want to live our lives while we can still make these decisions.
I took notes and thought about it a lot, but I didn’t get it done, maybe because I was too busy living: traveling to Australia, giving presentations and media interviews, taking on new writing projects, and abruptly facing new health challenges. Now that I’m about to turn 81, with another year lived and pondered, it’s time for “What Matters and What Doesn’t As We Age: Reflections on Turning 81.”
Some Things I’m Experiencing:
I always pictured 80 as a last gasp before dying. Struggling to hang onto the threads of daily needs and functions, with little or no quality of life. I acknowledge that I’m the recipient of great privilege to say that my brain still works well — not as well as when I was younger and sharper, but well.
My memory never was great, and it’s worse now. I struggle for the right word more often. I have to create routines and tricks to keep track of my phone, my glasses, my coffee mug. Several times a day I stride purposely into a room only to realize I don’t remember what I came here to do. (Fortunately, the elusive intention comes back quickly — so far!) When leaving the house, I have to check that my shoes match!
I’m still writing professionally and giving speeches and interviews internationally. I’m at the top of my career. Retire? Ha! And yet I’ve peeled back my activities to do those that matter most to me, saying “no” more often than “yes” to new projects and invitations.
Health is one thing after another at my age. Some things resolve after a day. Some require medical interventions. Some I need to live with. I don’t care to get into the details, but let’s say I deal with medical issues every day. As Larry Kassman, retired emergency physician and my dear, wise brother, told me, “Our bodies aren’t made to last forever.”
Some Background that Matters
I nearly didn’t make it to age 36, when an automobile accident almost killed me. I suffered many critical injuries, including a smashed face that had to be reconstructed from photographs, a jaw broken in 6 places, a neck fracture, and – the part that couldn’t be fixed — a shattered heel and ankle.
“You’ll walk again,” doctors told me, “but maybe not normally or painlessly.”
“I don’t care about walking normally — I want to dance!” I replied.
A year later, I was teaching aerobic dance. Later I switched to teaching line dancing — which I still do, with great joy!
I’m privileged and grateful that my body works as well as it does. I know firsthand what it looks like and feels like to lose the ability to walk, to eat solid food, to be physically independent. I’m grateful that I’m functioning now, and I know that could change at any moment.
What Does Matter
- Staying connected to the people we love and who love us.
- Keeping love and sexual pleasure alive with intention.
- Keeping our brain active by reading and learning something new every day.
- Doing the activities we care about and letting go of those we don’t.
- Helping others with our knowledge, skills and kindness.
- Staying physically active to the extent we’re able.
- Sharing what we’re learning about aging so it’s less mysterious to others — and to ourselves!
What Doesn’t Matter
Looking older. Wrinkles. Goodness yes, every part of me has wrinkles. Even my wrinkles have wrinkles! I am fascinated by my forearm wrinkles when I hold up my arm to let gravity put on a show. If I turn my wrist slowly, I get a display of changing patterns and textures. Sorry I can’t include a video.
The skin of my thighs, still strong and muscular from more than half a century of dedicated daily exercise, is nonetheless so wrinkled that it seems to fold in on itself. But so what! These thighs still let me walk three miles a day and dance for two hours.
Here’s how I see my aging appearance: When I was young, my genes determined how I looked. Now my age and experience determine how I look. I am happy with that.
Framing My Goals
What will I do today to give myself a sense of accomplishment?
What will I do today to give myself joy and calm?
What will I do today to support my health and wellbeing?
My Advice (if you want advice) from turning 76 in 2019, still useful:
- Move as much as possible — your health depends on it.
- Adopt the “if not now, when?” mindset and live your bucket list now.
- If your relationship situation needs changing, change it.
- Put plans in place now that you might need later: financial, healthcare, will, advance directive.
- Take care of things now that you don’t want your loved ones to have to figure out when you’re unable.
- Spend time with friends — we don’t know how long they’ll be with us.
- Tell the people you love that you love them.
- Learn from the past, celebrate the present, be unafraid of the future.
My Messages to Myself and to You:
- Keep moving, keep learning, keep helping others.
- Some things we can control; others we can’t. Let’s put our efforts into what we can control, change, make better.
- We may be challenged as we age, but we don’t have to be diminished.
- Every year, every day, every step we take is a gift.
- Instead of the fruitless search to regain our youth, let’s celebrate our age and dance forward into the years ahead.
Your Turn:
What matters and what doesn’t as you age? I’d love to hear from you. Please comment, and include your age.
Want to be interviewed in a film?
Have you or your relationship benefited from the work I do and the information I teach?
Have my books, articles, consults, or presentations made a strong impact on you or changed something about your life? Do you see aging and sexuality differently now than you used to?
If so, would you be willing to be interviewed about this in a documentary film?
Deirdre Fishel, a longtime independent filmmaker, is directing a documentary film about me, my work and its impact, my daily life, and my attitudes about aging, sex, love, and much more. Originally, the film was about older women who are reinventing old age and living productive, vibrant, sexual lives. It’s been reimagined as a shorter film featuring me. I am honored!
Joan’s morning ritual
Deirdre and her delightful film crew visited me for three days, filming my daily activities and interviewing me about both my personal life and my mission to help seniors embrace sexual pleasure. The crew is returning in May 2025 for another shoot. I don’t know when the film will come out — it’s a process, a journey! — I’ll be sure to announce it here.
Joan and Mac walk Spring Lake, Santa Rosa, CA
Deirdre knows what I think — now she wants to understand the impact of my work.
She’s eager to meet people whose lives have been changed in some way by my influence. She is looking for women and/or couples who might be willing to share their story. If you are interested in learning more, please email Deirdre Fishel to set up an exploratory call to discuss the project and what participating might entail.
1/10/25 UPDATE: You have the option to be be interviewed with only your voice recorded anonymously, if you’d be uncomfortable on camera or being identified. In that case, only Deirdre will know who you are, and I vouch for her ethics. If you’re happy to be on camera, we’ll make that happen!
Deirdre Fishel